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A Connecticut man called 911 on Wednesday to report a deli was making his sandwich wrong. “I specifically asked for, um, little um, turkey, and little, um, ham and a lot of cheese and a lot of mayonnaise,” he told the dispatcher. “And they are giving me a hard time so I was wondering if you could stop by…” The dispatcher responds incredulously: “You’re calling 911 because you don’t like the way they’re making your sandwich?” His response? “Exactly.”

The man, who gives his name as Rother McLennon, called from the Grateful Deli in East Hartford, according to CBS NY. He was advised by the flummoxed dispatcher not to buy the sandwich and to leave the store. But that was not the end of the conversation. McLennon went on about his sandwich woes for approximately two minutes. The problem, you see, is that McLennon frequents the joint, and he…

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The best one yet! “Emails From My Grandma : FW: 3 German Shepherds”

Hilarious! Thanks Grandma.

This is a very funny video.keep watching, as they will show the dogs having more “sips” throughout the video.
Be sure to turn on your sound and listen carefully to the bartender.
3 German Shepherds in a British pub.
You gotta love the bartender….

Emails From My Grandma : The COWBOY WAY to save Gasoline.

Cowboy Way
I really like the gasoline part at the end!!!

Cowboy rules for:

Arizona, Texas, Oklahoma, Colorado, New Mexico, Wyoming,Montana, Utah, Nebraska, Idaho, Nevada, and the rest of the Wild West are as follows:

1. Pull your pants up. You look like an idiot.

2. Turn your cap right, your head ain’t crooked.

3. Let’s get this straight: it’s called a ‘gravel road.’ I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you’re gonna get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.

4. They are cattle. That’s why they smell like cattle. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don’t like it? I-10 & I-40 go east and west, I-17 & I-15 goes north and south. Pick one and go.

5. So you have a $60,000 car. We’re impressed. We have $250,000 Combines that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

6. Every person in the Wild West waves. It’s called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.

7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese/pheasants/ducks/doves are comin’ in during a hunt, we WILL shoot it outta your hand. You better hope you don’t have it up to your ear at the time.

8. Yeah. We eat trout, salmon, deer and elk. You really want sushi and caviar? It’s available at the corner bait shop.

9. The ‘Opener’ refers to the first day of deer season. It’s a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

10. We open doors for women. That’s applied to all women, regardless of age.

11. No, there’s no ‘vegetarian special’ on the menu. Order steak, or you can order the Chef’s Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.

12. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup! Oh, yeah … We don’t care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat… IT AIN’T REAL CHILI!!

13. You bring ‘Coke’ into my house, it better be brown, wet and served over ice. You bring ‘Mary Jane’ into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

14. College and High School Football is as important here as the Giants, the Yankees, the Mets, the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.

15. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don’t hit the water hazards – it spooks the fish.

16. Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity-thump ain’t music, anyway. We don’t want to hear it anymore than we want to see your boxers! Refer back to #1!

A true Westerner will send this to at least 10 others and a few new friends that probably won’t get it, but we’re friendly so we share in hopes you can begin to understand what a real life is all about!!!

And there is more………….
The COWBOY WAY to save Gasoline.

Government wants us to cut the amount of gasoline we use…..

The best way to stop using so much gasoline is to deport 15 million illegal immigrants!

That would be 15 million fewer people using our gas.
The price of gas would come down…..
Bring our troops home fromAfghanistan to guard the borders…..

When they catch an illegal immigrant crossing the Border, hand him a canteen, rifle and some ammo and ship him to Afghanistan ….

Tell him if he wants to come toAMERICA then he must serve a tour in OUR military….

Give him a soldier’s pay while he’s there and tax him on it……

After his tour, he will be allowed to become a citizen since he defended this country…..
He will also be registered to be taxed and be a legal resident…..
This option will probably deter illegal immigration and provide a solution for the troops in Afghanistan and the aliens trying to make a better life for themselves. …….

If they refuse to serve, ship them toAfghanistan anyway,without the canteen, rifle or ammo.

Problem solved……

If you think this is a good solution to both the problems, forward it to your friends………..

I just did………..

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Emails From My Grandma : It’s hard to believe that CBS actually said something that wasn’t flattering to this President!

Subject: Air Force ONE

It’s hard to believe that CBS actually said something that wasn’t flattering to this President!

Air Force One:

This is from Mark Knoller of CBS.

The pilots and crew of Air Force One are flying more hours than a rookie on a beer run.

They are tired of it too, and are adding more crew to Air Force-1, – I know this for a fact because I’m one of the instructors that trains the crews. Our company (Atlas Air) has had the Air Force-1 and E-4 contract for over three years and I’ve been doing it for about 18 months now.

Last year (2011) Obama flew in Air Force One 172 times, almost every other day. White House officials have been telling reporters in recent days that the Democrat doesn’t intend to hang around the White House quite so much in 2012.They explain he wants to get out more around the country because, as everyone knows, that midterm election shellacking had nothing to do with his health care bill, over-spending or other policies, and everything to do with Obama’s not adequately explaining himself to his countrymen and women.

And with only 288 days remaining in Obama’s never ending presidential campaign, the incumbent’s travel pace will not likely slacken. At an Air Force-estimated cost of $181,757 per flight HOUR (not to mention the additional travel costs of Marine One, Secret Service, logistics and local police overtime), that’s a lot of frequent flier dollars going into Obama’s carbon footprint.

$8 Million every time it lands & takes off.

We are privy to some of these numbers thanks to CBS’ Mark Knoller, a bearded national treasure trove of presidential stats. According to Knoller’s copious notes, during the last year, Obama made 65 domestic trips over 104 days, and six trips to eight countries over 22 days. Not counting six vacation trips over 32 days. He took 196 helicopter trips, signed 203 pieces of legislation and squeezed in 29 rounds of left-handed golf.

Obama last year gave 491 speeches, remarks or statements. That’s more talking than goes on in some entire families, at least from fatherly mouths. In fact, even including the 24 days of 2010 that we never saw Obama in public, his speaking works out to about one official utterance every 11 waking hours. Aides indicate the “Real Good Talker” believes we need more.

Related: Obama spends nearly half his presidency outside Washington, plans to travel more.

Related: Vacationer-in-Chief Spends $1.75 Million to Visit Hawaiian Chums.

Obama has spent over $100 million taxpayer dollars flying around in Air Force One, and probably another $100 million on his entourage.

Obama is just another tin-pot dictator living lavishly at the expense of his subjects.

And we seniors have to “tighten our belts”

THANKS TO ALL WHO HELPED PUT THIS GREEDY WINDBAG IN OFFICE!
PLEASE BE MORE CAREFUL NEXT TIME!!
America’s continued freedom depends upon your awareness !

Emails From My Grandma : FW: Talking in Public— Cell Phone Solution

After a very busy day, a commuter settled down in her seat and closed her eyes as the train departed Montreal for Hudson.

As the train rolled out of the station, the guy sitting next to her pulled out his cell phone and started talking in a loud voice: “Hi sweetheart it’s Eric, I’m on the train – yes, I know it’s the six thirty and not the four thirty but I had a long meeting – no, honey, not with that floozie from the accounts office, with the boss. No sweetheart, you’re the only one in my life – yes, I’m sure, cross my heart” etc., etc.

Fifteen minutes later at St. Anne de Bellevue he was still talking loudly , when the young woman sitting next to him, who was obviously angered by his continuous diatribe, yelled at the top of her voice:

“Hey, Eric, turn that stupid phone off and come back to bed!”

My guess would be that Eric doesn’t use his cell phone in public any longer.